Complications
by Malformed Entity
Summary: is irvine cheating on Selphie? does Zell like Selphie? does she like him too? Is quistis pregnant? is rinoa really a black person? is squall a homosexual? is cid a male strip dancer?Read to see! Done
1. begining of the stuff Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy 8 or any of its characters. I have no legal rights to Square-Enix.

7:30 pm "Ugh where is that poopoo face?" Selphie says as she calls Irvine on her cell phone but all she hears is a busy tone. 7:45 "That stupid head better get here."Selphie says while trying to reach Irvine but no luck and once again busy tone. 8:00 "Finally!" Selphie waves at the old broken down car with the blue paint ripped off and lumped in metal everywhere.

Selphie jumps in and asked, " Where were you? I was calling u and it was always busy.and why are u SO late?"

" Oh. I'm sorry.I sold my cell phone because I needed the 15 gils and I had to um.rearrange my socks?"

"Whatever.so where are we going, dollet, deling?" asked a curious Selphie.

"Winhill" replied Irvine.

"Ok.and.why?" Asked in a tired voice.

"Because.UHHHH.it's a romantic place?" Irvine said really fast while parking in front of a hamburger/hotdog stand. "We're gonna eat here, ok?"

(Shrugs and spots someone familiar)

8:30 They sat down and Irvine hangs his coat on the back of his chair.

"I'll get the hamburger and fries meal and coke, what will u get Selphie?" Said Irvine while staring at the waitress's legs.

"I'll get what you're getting." Selphie said as she looked at a familiar person chowing down on hotdogs.

8:45 "Here you go.2 hamburger and fries meal.and your cokes," said the waitress and then turns around taking the orders for other customers.

Irvine looks at the waitress's ass and then at Selphie. "Is there a problem Selphie?" Irvine says while staring at the direction of where Selphie was staring.

"Brr.it's kind of cold here."Selphie says while turning her head back to Irvine.

"Yeah.it kind of is."Irvine said as he lifted his heavy coat. "Hehe, why thank you!" Selphie said closing her eyes "huh?"

Irvine takes his coat and wears it himself. " HUH? Thank me for what?"

"Nothing.." Selphie said shaking her head and continues staring at the familiar figure.

9:15 "Are u gonna eat that? Irvine said poking the abandoned hamburger. "Ya. ya.sure." Selphie says and takes a fry, nibbling on it. "I have to go to the bathroom," said Selphie rushing off to the direction of the bathroom.

As she reached the door she saw it was locked.(Amazing.only one unisex bathroom stall.thingy). A man came over and "attacked" her, Selphie tried to get her nunchaku but was unable to reach it. She was screaming Irvine's name over and over and over again.(the bathroom wasn't that far away from the seats). Theman tried to knock her out but a blonde man came out of nowhere and punched the lights out of the man. The blonde man was Zell!

"Are u alrite?"Said Zell "I came over as soon as I saw the commotion".

"I'm okay.now that you're here" Selphie whispered

While this happened.&&&.

"Hey baby.wassup? I love the way u look tonight." Irvine said to a girl in a blue uniform.

"You trying to ask me out?" asked the girl

"Yah." Irvine answered but then remembered Selphie so he just shrugged and just kept on commenting the girl on her looks and such.

Then he looked at her for REAL and saw that it was Quistis, she looked a little drunk. Be then ordered a lot of beers to kill the time while he waited for Selphie. Now they are both drunk and he was getting her into the car. They drove to Balamb and got into Irvine's dorm. HEHEHE.

Back to Selphie and Zell

"You look really cold, here" Zell said and gave her a light jacket. "Want me to drive you back to Balamb?"

"Okay" Selphie said and looked at Irvine getting into the car with Quistis.

9:45 Driving back

"So what happened?" asked Zell

"I don't know I just wanted to go to the bathroom and that guy came out of no where and attacked me and I was yelling Irvine! Irvine! But he never came. he is acting weird lately. Thank goodness you came!" answered Selphie.

".Well here we are" Zell told Selphie.

"Here."Selphie said while giving Zell's jacket back. +

Umm.w/e. I know this is kinda stupid but whatcha gunna do? Review time!

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	2. PREGNACY! and otha crazy stuff1 Chapter ...

+ ************************************************************************ Sorry it took so long to post this and it's so short too.. Oh well enjoy!!! (If u read the first chapter early when I first published it then read the ending again. I changed it so the hug didn't take place in the first chapter so.well aint really important lol)  
  
Selphie looked back at the beautiful Jaguar (the car) and then walked forward with Zell. Selphie wasn't paying attention and was going to walk right into the wall so Zell gently pushed her away from the wall when Sephie finally snapped out of her thoughts. But not much later they were there to Selphie's dorm so she said "Thank you and good night" to Zell then hugging him.  
  
Zell headed back to his dorm. Selphie stood in her dorm and started to clean some things up and then she thought about Irvine and her.things weren't going right.he suddenly became cheap, selfish and just plain mean! So after a while of thinking she went to Irvine's dorm to tell him she wanted to break up. As she walked down the dorm rooms she wondered if this was the proper thing to do.of course!! She finally got to his dorm room.  
  
Selphie slowly turned the knob and opened the door. She saw Irvine and Quistis naked under the bed sheets.  
  
"AHH! WTF?" Selphie screamed in shock.  
  
"Buttered toast!" replied Quistis still in a drunk voice.  
  
"MEOW! Come here little kitty!" Irvine screamed out in a drunken voice.  
  
"Ok.I'm out of here. and I just want to tell you, Irvine that I want to break out with you! B*****d." Said Selphie while punching him in the face more than anyone can count.  
  
Selphie ran back to her own dorm and started to trash it because she was so pissed at Irvine. She took her nunchaku and started to attack everything in her dorm and finally the last thing, a vase with that one dead flower in it from the first date Irvine and Selphie went out (The only flower he gave her, better yet, only gift). She took her nunchaku and slammed it hard on the vase, it fell onto the ground.  
  
Selphie walked to the bathroom to wash her face but she slipped on the water from the vase and fell on the broken glass and wood. Pieces of glass were now stuck on her left arm and she had splinters on her arm too. She screamed in pain like crazy. Coincidently Zell was walking down the hall and heard her scream and rushed into her room and helped her up. He carried her to the infirmary because she fainted.  
  
++++++++++++++Next day+++++++++++++++++++++  
  
"Huh?" Selphie questions while waking up. She looked at the nearby chair, finding a sleeping Zell then looking at her own arm.wow healed so much already. She sat there thinking about Zell and her. Zell suddenly woke up and then moved closer to Selphie.  
  
"Hi" said Zell joyfully.  
  
"Hey.were you there the whole night?" Asked Selphie.  
  
Zell was about to answer when Irvine barged through the door. "SELPHIE!!" he cried. BURP "Whoops excuse me, I had to much booze last night and I don't know why but I woke up with a big bruise on my eye!!"  
  
"How dare you treat Selphie that wa-.." Said Zell and he fell asleep again.  
  
"ERR!! Stupid fools!!" yelled Selphie. "Hey guess what? I saw Yuffie and a cute lil dolphin in my butt!!"  
  
"Huh That Yuffie chick!?" Irvine asked. "WHERE!? How come I don't see her?"  
  
"Cuz you UGLAY!!"  
  
Irvine shook his head. "Last night, I found out that I had STD!!"  
  
"Really now? Perhaps you got the cooties from Quistis!! I knew you should have slept with Steiner!!"  
  
BURP!! "But you know, I said that my head will crack one day!!" said Red VIII  
  
"HUH!? Where did you come from!!?!?!?" Selphie and Irvine asked in surprise.  
  
Zell's head shot up. "Ayyyy." he said sleepily.  
  
"Pop tarts!" yelled Tifa, then fading away into fat air.  
  
"No0o0 come back!" Irvine running towards the window and then farting. He sniffed his fart deeply and then jumped out of the window and faded away, disappearing to fat air.  
  
Dr. Kadowaki came in. "Selphie,. How are you feeling dear?" Then she suddenly turned into a donkey!! HE HAWWW (runs away and flies away while farting loudly for super speed.)  
  
Selphie got up and walked lifelessly to the door and crashed through it. Zell ran for her and tripped over a duck. Selphie walks to her dorm and eats chicken nuggets. Zell wakes up in the middle of the night and the duck finally runs away. Zell goes back to sleep and gets a nightmare because he dreamt of Seifer's face.  
  
  
  
Next morning  
  
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
"POOPIE!!" Selphie and Zell yell out and fall asleep.  
  
()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()() ()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()  
  
"WHAA!!" Quistis yells while finding out that she is.(looks around) pregnant..  
  
Well on to another topic but I wont for get about Selphie and Zell now would I? Oh yeah.REVIEW TIME!! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 


	3. Pregnacy and the otha crazy stuff 2 Chap...

You think I'm crazy yet? If so still read on! I'll get more serious and if not.ummm do the same thing =) hehe!!! """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" Selphie goes to the cafeteria for more chicken nuggets when she spots Zell sitting on a table. She starts walking over and Zell waves hi at her. She walks faster and trips over a half eaten hotdog. Zell rushes over to pick up the hotdog and said "Hey, you ok? ", and starts munching on the half eaten hotdog.  
  
"Yeah! But now I got ketchup and mustard all over my new boots and jumper! Aww poopie...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Replied Selphie in frustration.  
  
(Blink blink) "Umm.. ok.I wasn't talking to you.I was talking to the little hotdog.anyways.you wanna eat sugar with me?" Zell asked while Selphie started running to each table and collecting sugar packs.  
  
"No0o0o! That's not enough!" Zell complains while looking at all the sugar packs Selphie had.  
  
"I have a really big collection of sugar, over 1,000,000 sugar packs! But.Squall told me to stop taking them everyday so I stopped.but they can last for maybe a half of a year at the rate we're eating them.but we can add these in too..." Said Zell while dragging Selphie to his dorm.  
  
Selphie's eyes gazed at the big pile of sugar packs in Zell's bathroom. She took a hand full of the sugar packs, opened them and then stuffed the sugar in her mouth.  
  
"MMM!!"  
  
~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~ 3 months later *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*  
  
"AHHHH! Oh my.Oh no.I haven't noticed this.It's starting to show." Quistis complained, " maybe I should tell some one about this." Quistis takes 3 hours thinking of whom to tell this to and she finally thought of an answer. Edea!  
  
++Quistis goes to Edea and tells her what's happening++  
  
"... And I don't know why I'm pregnant!" finished Quistis.  
  
"Wow amazing I have a idea of who the father could be.just stay here.I have to investigate." Edea says while taking out a magnifying glass and her detective hat. Edea walks to a hide out where Seifer usually hangs out. Edea uses some special powers and lifts up Seifer by his underwear, which was pink with little puppies on it. She uses her mind and throws him to the floor which has pillows on it.  
  
"Hey! W-W-What was that for?!?!"  
  
"Did you do anything with Quistis?!?!"  
  
"HELL NO!! I didn't even see her for a half a year!"  
  
"o0o0o. ok I'll try Irvine.that horny b*****d"  
  
Edea goes to Irvine's dorm room and uses her mind power and does the same that she did to Seifer. Irvine started to cry.  
  
"E-E-EDEA!!!! WHY DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!! WHAAA!! WHAAAA!!"  
  
"What did you do with Quistis?" Asked Edea.  
  
"I don't know! Nothing! I didn't do anything.but I have this vision in my head.I don't want to talk about it."  
  
"TELL ME OR SUFFER!"  
  
"OKAY! OKAY! WE WAS UMM.doing something private.I think we were drunk.. AHH THERE! I TOLD YOU!"  
  
"OK.Quistis told me that she went to get a few drinks because she her goldfish died." Said Edea, "HMM.Do you know that Quistis is pregnant? And it's all because of you!"  
  
"AHH! ME? No way.it can't be.umm" Said Irvine.  
  
Irvine barged out of the room and headed to Quistis's dorm. He opened the door and looked at Quistis.  
  
"Hey.Ummm Edea told me all about it!" screamed Irvine.  
  
"HUH? What? Do you have a new goldfish for me? I want to name it Bobo.HUH? Asked Quistis.  
  
"No I am the father of that child!" Irvine told her while poking at Quistis's stomach. (Jaw drops all the way to the other side of the earth.)  
  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
  
DUM DUMM DUMMMMM! I know you expected that but ya know. w/e.Review time! /*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/* /*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/ 


	4. More of the Zell and Selphie stuff! Chap...

'' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' '' Well...maybe I didn't really become more serious but that's ok.w/e.no one reads this anyways.so sad.  
  
"You are this child's father?" Quistis asked while poking her own stomach "OUCH!"  
  
"Yes. I believe it is true."  
  
"Oh.my umm." Quistis trailed off and ran away.  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~! ~!~!~!  
  
"o0oo.my stomach.o0o0oo" Selphie and Zell complained.  
  
"I think we been eating to much sugar for the last.how long have we been here?" Asked Zell.  
  
"Um.I unno.ugh.my stomach.o0o0o.like 3 months.I UNNO!" answered Selphie.  
  
"Lets clean up these sugar packet thingies."  
  
"OKAY!"  
  
Selphie and Zell starts cleaning up the sugar packet thingies and threw them out by the balcony where squall and Rinoa first kissed. They took all of the bags full of them thingies and just threw 'em away. The bags flung open and all of the thingies became like ninja stars and they started to attack the side of balamb garden.  
  
"OH NO! RUN!" Zell screamed while dragging Selphie on the floor.  
  
The thingies flew and cut Zell's arm, another one got stuck on his back and another one on his leg. He started to run and dragged Selphie along with him. He went to the infirmary only to find that the thing her dragged was not Selphie it was another bag of those thingies. He ran back limping to find Selphie. He found Selphie on edge of the balcony grasping on banister thingy. None of the thingies hurt her though. Zell ran to go rescue her when the thingies suddenly had minds and started to team up on him. He tried to dodge them with his special martial arts power. But they cornered him and they all got stuck all over his body. He was still awake and ran to the edge to rescue Selphie, he pulled her up and pushed her inside and away from the thingies. He started to pick the thingies off his body, they floated down to the ground and he was bleeding all over his body. He, still limping slowly walked to the door when the thingies rose from the floor and started to float. They flew away and in the distinct you can see them cutting down trees.  
  
Zell walked inside and he saw Selphie then he fainted. (Boy! Now she must carry him to the infirmary.) And so she did but not carrying she dragged him. She finally arrived to the infirmary 30 minutes later.  
  
1 week later  
  
"Hello.hello?" Selphie said.  
  
"Huh?" Zell asked.  
  
"Hello Mr. Sleepy Head!" Selphie yelled.  
  
"AHH! What happened?" asked Zell.  
  
"HI Zell!" Everyone said. Wow everyone was there.  
  
"hi peoples."  
  
By the corner you can see Irvine and Quistis together holding hands.(??AWW??) Rinoa and Squall were sitting side by side and also holding hands, Squall had left over pink nail polish on his nails... Seifer was there too.weird. Edea and Cid were there too and had so many flowers with them, from under the white pants cid was wearing you could see a black leather underwear.okee.Zell turned around and saw Selphie's face just an inch away from his own face.  
  
"Whoa!" Zell screamed surprised.  
  
Selphie backed away and blushed, "You look so cute while your sleeping teehee!"  
  
"huh? Uhhhh.really? Zell now started to blush as well.  
  
"HAHA! Chickenwuss finally has a girlfriend!" Seifer teased  
  
"Huh?" Both Selphie and Zell said while blushing so much that their faces look like someone painted their faces with really red paint. (crimson red)  
  
"Oh shut up Seifer! Now you just ruined all the fun!" Said Edea.  
  
"WTF?!?!? We are not girlfriends and boy friends!" Zell and Selphie said together.  
  
"HAHA! Stop hiding it!" Quistis said while rubbing her stomach.  
  
"What's the matter Quistis are you ok?" Asked Selphie steering the topic to something else.  
  
"Ya.I'm ok.but there is something I have to tell you.I'm pregnant!" Quistis said. "Oh.But how?" Selphie asked.  
  
"Umm its kinda hard to explain.see."Quistis told them about the story.  
  
"o0o0o.IRVINE?!?!? I KNEW IT!!! Err.." Yelled Selphie.  
  
"D-D-Don't yell! I'm sorry but I think either you or me want to be together anymore and for me its not because I don't like you its just I have problems"  
  
"Ya. I know you have problems.and its true. I don't like you like that anymore!.there is someone else now." Selphie said while peeking at Zell.  
  
Zell was blushing and so was Selphie.(Hehe I know you know where I'm leading this to.)  
  
Selphie whispered something to Zell's ear, which made him blush, and she walked away.  
  
"So what did she tell you?" Everyone asked.  
  
"Nothing she just told me to meet her in the training center."  
  
"o0o0o0 hahah!" Everyone laughed and talked among themselves.  
  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^  
  
Next night $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$  
  
Zell and Selphie meet in the training center entrance and walk in talking.  
  
"Hey gimme the binoculars! It's my turn!" Irvine said to Quistis.  
  
"Where did yours go?" Asked Quistis.  
  
"I don't know. I was yarning and I swallowed and then it was gone.my throat hurts." answered Irvine.  
  
"Oh well if I miss anything I'll kill you."  
  
"SHHH" everyone told Quistis.  
  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
Selphie walk to the picnic table thing and told Zell to sit down.  
  
"Umm I know this will be embarrassing butt his questions is killed me. d-d- do you like me like me? Asked Selphie.  
  
"Well.do you like me like me? Asked Zell.  
  
"I ASKED YOU FIRST!" Selphie said.  
  
"Ok.ugh.umm I don't know how to say this.so.yes." Zell said smiling.  
  
".Uhhhh.hard one for me too." said Selphie  
  
"That's ok. no one likes me anyways." Zell told Selphie.  
  
"No.noo0o.I-I-I DO like you." Selphie said and blushed a little.  
  
"Well I guess we were expecting those answers huh?" Zell said also blushing.  
  
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++  
  
"o0o0o! I wonder what they are talking about!" Irvine shrieked.  
  
"SHH!"  
  
"Hey, gimme the binoculars" Said Quistis while looking into them, "They're probably talking about how much they love each other.  
  
"HEHEHEHE" Everyone said.  
  
{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}  
  
"Umm uhhhh.do you want to go out for dinner?" asked Zell.  
  
"SURE!" Selphie said while putting her arms around Zell's arm.  
  
OK! Nice! W/e! Is anyone reading this fanfic? If so please gimme a review or I will commit suicide! I mean what's the meaning in life if no one reads your fanifcs? So please review unless you want to read about a girl committing suicide because of no reviews. 


	5. read and see! Chapter 5

Hey sorry it took me so long its just I was soo0o0 discouraged. O well and also I got skewl! PAIN IN THE ASS! +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++  
  
*****At fancy hotdog restaurant*****  
  
"What would you like to eat?" Zell said.  
  
"I'll have the hotdog salad, hotdog noodles and a hotdog sundae for desert." Selphie replied.  
  
"MmMm that sounds good I'll have that too then!" Zell said.  
  
(SCENE FADES)  
  
*******Blah blah blah couple o' years later*******  
  
"Hey Rinoa lookie what Zell got me it those cell phones where you can see the person you talking to in a holographic way! I've always wanted this!" Selphie said joyfully.  
  
"Cool it's so hot today..." Rinoa said as she started sweating and her make up melted, you could now see her black skin. (No offence to anyone black)  
  
"Zell said that he was gunna do something special today! I wonder what it is!" Selphie shouted.  
  
(RING RING RING)  
  
"HEY IT'S Zell!" Selphie said as she opened her phone and watched the holographic picture of Zell's face.  
  
"HI ZELLIE WELLIE!" Selphie screamed.  
  
"HEHE ok! Don't even blink!" Zell said.  
  
In the picture you could see Zell jump off a airplane and his parachute coming out, on the parachute it said "MARRY ME!"  
  
"OMIGOSH! OF COURSE!" Selphie screamed so joyfully that she was gunna burst.  
  
-__________30 minutes later_________-  
  
()() In another restaurant with everyone there ()()  
  
-talking and talking- "We're going to get married and you all invited!" Zell and Selphie said.  
  
"I still got something for you Selphie." Zell said quietly.  
  
Zell opened a small box with a diamond ring inside; the diamond was so big too!  
  
"OMIGOSH Zell! I LOVE YOU!" Selphie said really loud.  
  
Selphie hugged then kissed Zell.  
  
"EWWW Selphie, doesn't that burn? I mean hello! You're kissing chicken- wuss!" Seifer said.  
  
"OH Shut up!" Selphie screamed at Seifer while threatening to kill him with a hand gesture.  
  
******************AT WEDDING*****************  
  
(Wedding song in a rock way)  
  
Zell stood by the priest guy as Quistis crawled around with a flower basket to pretend she was the flower girl. Then a wobbly 2 years old was the ring boy. Selphie came in the room walking slowly to Zell.  
  
"...Do you Zell Dincht take Selphie as your lawfully wedded wife?" the dude asked.  
  
"I do" Zell said very happy voice.  
  
"Do you Selphie Tilmitt take Zell as your lawfully wedded husband?" the dude asked.  
  
"OF COURSE" Selphie said as if she was going to fly all over the place.  
  
"I umm...whatever you guys are husband and wife you may kiss the bride." The dude said as Selphie and Zell kissed.  
  
"EWW she did it again!" Seifer said.  
  
"IT SO BEAUTIFUL! I CANT BELIEVE IT!" Rinoa said with her eyes full of tears, as a tear dropped down her cheek, her make-up was washed off and you could see her black skin again.  
  
Squall started breaking into tears and had a episode, Quistis was eating the left over flower in her basket, Irvine was feeding the kid, Phillip (still drinks milk ya know...) Seifer was throwing up, Cid was polishing pole dancing...without a pole... Edea was also crying but in a happy way. The dude was hogging all the cake and Zell's mom was so proud that she threw-up. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Not much chapters left now! Hope youz liked this one! (((((((((((((((((((((((((( 


	6. Chapter 6

*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&*& Like I said before I have so many projects this month and I only got 3 hours of sleep! Well I wrote this at 3:00 AM so w/e. ^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^^&^  
  
Rinoa rushed to the bathroom to fix her face, while Squall flew out of the window. Quistis, Irvine, and Phillip beat the priest up. Edea fell asleep and Cid started to strip for not reason. Selphie got confused to she got into Zell's car. Selphie threw the flower thingy and it caused a car accident, the flowers blinded the driver in the back and it backed up and hit another and another and another...and so they went to their honeymoon.  
  
When they came back they saw that everyone was still doing what they were going weeks before... except Cid's wig fell off. (Suddenly something popped up .Cid from 7, 9, and 10 asked "WHO US?" OH NO WE DON'T HAVE WIGS.(all of their wigs fall off....) Dang.. O WELL! Selphie told them all to stop, and Zell and Selphie looked at Rinoa (which all of her make up was smudged all over the chairs.)  
  
YOU IS BLACK! (No offense...)  
  
Cid finished stripping and whipped a chair with his whip. Quistis kicked the priest one last time and he died.  
  
"Ok...do you wanna got out for a drink?" asked Zell.  
  
"SURE ANYTHING TO LEAVE THIS HELL HOLE" Sephie replied.  
  
Then they just found out that they are only 20 and can't get beer..  
  
But good thing Zell stole Rinoa's I.D. and he stole Cid's I.D.  
  
Zell handed Selphie Cid's card...  
  
"WHAT THE??? HEY MAN I SHOULD BE RINOA!" Selphie shouted. "AND WHAT THE DEALIO? RINOA IS ALSO 20!!  
  
"Oh.HEHEHE HE.. Well.it says she is 37."  
  
**GOES INTO BAR***  
  
Zell drank 7 bottles of beer and Selphie drank 2 bottles.  
  
"How do we go home?" Asked Selphie.  
  
Zell fell asleep; Selphie dragged him on the floor until she got to the car. She put him in the back seat and sat on the driver's chair. (She couldn't get her license card because on the day of the test she went berserk and burned down the car and she cant try out for another one...)  
  
But she tried to drive back to Zell's house where she forgot how to brake so she crashed into Zell's kitchen. BUT THE CAR DIDN'T EVEN DENT!  
  
Mama: What happened? You messed up the hamburgers!  
  
(Pikachu from pokemon comes and bites Zell's nose.)  
  
Selphie: UHH HE GOT DRUNK!  
  
Mama: HOW? HE'S 20 years old...  
  
Selphie: I know...(THROWS UP)  
  
******NEXT DAY******  
  
"UGH MY HEAD..." Zell says.  
  
(A pikachu runs up to Zell and offers him acid. Zell takes it and got high.)  
  
Selphie was in the kitchen trying to tape the pieces of the kitchen back together. " ELLO Zell." Pikachu said with a shadowy deep voice.  
  
" I AM YO FATHA" the pikachu turned into a pink pikachu with a pink hat.  
  
"WHOO HOO GO PIKACHU!" Squall runs in and runs away with the pikachu.  
  
Cid runs in and runs out of the house 3 times and pulls Pikachu away from Squall.  
  
They both pulled and tugged. Pikachu rips in half and they both get Pikachu!  
  
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ W/e.I must sleep... 


	7. Chapter 7

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| || Hey guys, umm not much chapters left....uhhhh ill try to make it more ideas ya know...ya w/e...imma not so high now so ya....  
  
Selphie is still taping it back as Zell runs up and down the stairs. Finally Zell jumps up and hit the taped wall, breaking it.  
  
"DAMMIT Zell I WAS TAPING THAT!!" Selphie yelled.  
  
Zell opens the door and looks around, "wha happened?"  
  
Zell closes the door and the whole house crumbles. "HEY MAN THAT'S NOT COOL..." Zell fell asleep.  
  
Zell's mom was not found when the firemen came to the rescue. Zell went to his dorm and saw a flying donkey. He got scared so he punches it. It fell down and turned into Zell's mom. Then she faded away, Zell fell asleep and he suddenly smelled smoke. He woke up and saw Selphie using a fire extinguisher trying to stop the flames.  
  
Next thing he knew a man with a pitch-black suit came in and kidnapped Zell and Selphie. They woke up hours later in a science lab kind of place. The man took off his mask and you could see he was a duck.  
  
"I AM PIKACHU IN ANOTHER BODY...REMEMBER I AM YO FATHA!" Pikachu said.  
  
Zell was unable to speak because his mouth was taped and so was Selphie's.  
  
"SINCE YOU ABANDONED ME...YOU WILL SUFFER!" Pikachu screamed.  
  
Pikachu took a bat out and aimed for Zell's head but he missed and hit Zell's legs. "MMAHHMMAHH.."  
  
Pikachu took out a sharp knife and threw it at Zell's legs. "OUUHUHHH"  
  
Pikachu pressed a button and a machine tied Zell's wrists to a rope attached to a stand. Pikachu took out a scalpel and started moving closer to the stomach slowly.  
  
Selphie got so scared she jumped up slowly and reached for a knife on the table. She cut her rope loose and threw the knife at pikachu.  
  
The knife hit pikachu in the neck and pikachu dropped the scalpel only 2mm away from Zell's skin.  
  
A blue soul came out of the dead body and it went into a goldfish in the tank surrounding the place. Selphie couldn't find a door so she beat the thick glass with the bat. Then she remembered to but the ropes to free Zell so she did that.  
  
While she was doing that the water was slowly squirting everywhere. The water pressure was high so it busted the glass and the fishes were here and there and water was EVERYWHERE. The evil goldfish went into Zell's pocket.  
  
They ran back to Quistis's dorm to ask for advice. The evil fish jumped into Quistis's still empty bowl.  
  
"YAY A GOLDFISH!!!" Quistis said and picked it up and hugged it.  
  
Zell looked at it but didn't react so he asked stuff and stuff...  
  
()()**()()**()()**()()**()()**()() 1 year later ()()**()()**()()**()()**()()**  
  
Zell: Hey man I gots the gils just lemme buy it!  
  
Salesman: Hell no you little brat, I've seen you before you counterfeit gils...  
  
Zell: NO I DON'T! LOOK (shows gils)  
  
Salesman: All right... here are the keys and your contract...Take good care of it.  
  
Zell looked up high at the mansion. He had been working for 20 hours a day for months to get all the money to buy this mansion. It is suppose to be the first anniversary gift for Selphie.  
  
That night he told her to close her eyes and they walked down the private road leading to the mansion. He lit the fireworks and told Selphie to open her eyes. She opened her eyes with delight and sees the 10-story mansion with balconies, a garden a pool inside and out. And the mansion must have been ½ mile long. Selphie gave Zell a long kiss and they sat and watched the fireworks.  
  
Quistis and Irvine were walking down the road looking for their lost child and saw the beautiful sight. Quistis smacked Irvine in the arm hard and punched him in the face. "WHY HAVEN'T YOU DONE SOMETIMES LIKE THIS?"  
  
"ALL YOU GOT ME FOR ALL 3 anniversaries were a half of a hamburger, a flower and a piece of cheese!" Quistis yelled at Irvine while kicking him in the crotch. Irvine had a short attention span so he just kept on walking.  
  
Little Phillip walked up to Zell and Selphie. Selphie picked him up and thought for a solution. She went into the house, which had a lot of furniture already, and called Irvine's cell phone. Irvine heard the happy news and ran towards the mansion. Selphie gave him his kid and went back to the picnic dinner.  
  
Zell and Selphie spent the whole night looking at the fireworks and stuff. The next day, Selphie woke up still outside...She must have fell asleep while having the picnic. She sat up for any sight of Zell he was sleeping just 2 feet away with a piece of soggy meat still in his mouth.  
  
He didn't want to wake him up so she stood up slowly and took her first step when Zell's eye's stroke open.  
  
"Hey...(Yarn) UHH we better get inside" Zell said while picking up the picnic cloth with all the leftovers.  
  
Well... uhhhh w/e umm sorry it took almost a month.I was busy but I found time. ^&#%^&#%^&$%^&$%^&$%^&$%^&$%^&


	8. Chapter 8 and last

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& Uhhhh w/e yah. &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
Now that everything is calm and fine Selphie remembered about Pikachu and thought about every moment of her life and why Pikachu attacked Zell and her.  
  
After 3 days of thinking she finally thought about her honeymoon around the world. She thought about every place she was in. Then she remembered when she and Zell was shopping and having fun in Deling City, Pikachu was cursing at everyone. Selphie was jumping around yelling " Shopping shopping were going shopping!" And she stepped on Pikachu.  
  
She said sorry but then she ran back to pikachu to see if he was ok but she tripped over her own feet and fell on Pikachu. Then she just ran away assuming that Pikachu died. Then she remembered that when she was in Winhill to get gas for the plane she stepped on a mini Pikachu...it must have been Pikachu's son or daughter.  
  
She didn't even notice all these things. When she was in Dollet she saw Pikachu following them and trying to throw rocks at them.  
  
"Holy camels!" Selphie said very loud.  
  
Selphie told Zell this and they went to Quistis's house (Irvine made a house for her as a make up gift for their anniversaries and it's not that bad looking)  
  
They looked for the goldfish but it wasn't in the tank. They ran to the bedroom where they saw Pikachu with a knife slicing Quistis and Irvine. Selphie took out her nunchaku and whipped Pikachu's ass. Zell punched Pikachu a lot until it was so weak it couldn't move. Selphie took Irvine's gun and aimed it at Pikachu.  
  
"Why do you want to kill us?" Selphie asked.  
  
"Because...I need to g-ge.........."Pikachu said and died off.  
  
Selphie shot him continuously to make sure it died. Zell gave Irvine and Quistis revive and they woke up. They all went to Rinoa's place. While they were about 100ft away you would hear raging rapping music.  
  
**Ding Dong**  
  
"Hey guys" Rinoa says.  
  
"UHHH" All of them were so scared.  
  
"WHAT?" Rinoa said confused.  
  
"YOU...YOU'RE BLACK?" Zell said almost fainting.  
  
"Oh crap I forgot my make-up" Rinoa said.  
  
"Please don't tell Squall he will be so confused..." Rinoa said while putting make-up on.  
  
"UHHHH I don't think you need to explain anything." Zell said while looking at Squall walking down the street with a dress and flirting with men.  
  
"Rinoa ran to Squall and asked him what the fuck was happening. Squall confessed that he was gay and she confessed that she was black. (NO OFFENCE)  
  
"Ok...I'm going to a strip joint" Irvine said.  
  
"OH, NO! NOT WITHOUT ME!" Quistis said.  
  
When they were there they say men stripping and Irvine got disturbed. Quistis was sleeping but when she heard the announcer say Cid she woke up. It was indeed CID, she waved at him and he waved back but it took 5 minutes until Cid figured out that it was Quistis. He got so embarrassed and ran away.  
  
The next day everyone was at Balamb Garden and having a meeting.  
  
Cid: So we know that I'm a male strip dancer...  
  
Zell, Selphie, Squall and Rinoa: No we didn't but now we do.  
  
Cid:...So only Quistis and Irvine knew?  
  
Irvine & Quistis: Yeah...  
  
Cid: Whatever the matter...and we know that Squall is a homosexual. ( NO OFFENCE!) We know that Rinoa is black. (NO OFFENCE) And we know that Quistis forgot to feed Phillip.  
  
Quistis: OH! I'm a bad mother...(runs out of door).  
  
Cid: SO...since we know each other's secrets, I guess we shouldn't just hide it anymore. Just show your real self...don't be ashamed!  
  
Selphie: ALL RIGHT! KICK ASS!! UP ALL OF YOURS except Zell!  
  
Everyone except Selphie: HUH? Ok....  
  
Selphie: AHEM....HEHE...Ok I'll shut up...  
  
Suddenly a donkey comes in and POOF! It turned into Zell's mom. "MOM!" Zell yells and hugs her.  
  
Now that everything is finally and once and for all normal...kind of, they lived happily ever after.  
  
(Quistis and Irvine had another baby called Bob and it was the reincarnation of Pikachu.)  
  
(Zell and Selphie never had kids and stayed a happy COUPLE for years and years until they died of old age, they died within the same hour.)  
  
(Squall married a guy named Chimbi and adopted a baby boy named Gullo.)  
  
(Rinoa lived her life to the fullest and married a guy named Titlios and had 2 kids named Ashina and Bozo.)  
  
(Cid worked for the stripping industry for so long, he got so rich that he bought extra rare medicine that makes you invincible.) (All of the other people went to a donut-eating contest and died from choking from the nastiness. Seifer was the cook. He died right after the contest when Barret just flashed in for a sec. and went out. That was the end of Seifer.)  
  
I had to end it! I aint going to the 10's I don't have enough time and anyways I ain't gunna have time for fanfics cuz I will be VERY busy for the nest 3 months. ............................... 


End file.
